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Being ghosted by your partner can be the worst feeling in a relationship. It indicates disrespect, disrespect, and insignificance.
That feeling you get when you realize that you are not important, despite everything you have invested in the relationship.
You met them; it seemed like love at first because you couldn’t hold back the euphoria that comes with meeting someone you are physically and emotionally connected to. Everything seems perfect—the spark, the chemistry, and… compatibility.
You can’t wait to spend the rest of your life with them because the intention is mutual and the bond is so strong. Then suddenly, they started giving you the silent treatment.
You sent a few messages that were delivered but got no response, and a few calls that went unanswered and never returned. You had to give them the benefit of the doubt because your instincts keep telling you that there might be something wrong with them. What if they are in danger? What if they are in a tight corner? What if they are unable to call? There’s lots of what-ifs.
These and more were your concerns. However, your concerns seem contradictory, as you have noticed that since they are not saying anything to you, they are still very active on their social media handles.
They update their WhatsApp status regularly and even comment on other people’s photos. Then it dawned on you that they had ghosted you.
Even with such evidence, you still had doubts. You don’t want to believe that; why would you? while it almost seems like you are already married. Your friends had advised you to move on, but your instincts still want to hold on, hoping it wasn’t a deliberate act.
As the days turned into weeks and you still hadn’t heard from them, you had to resort to the last alternative: visiting them in their closet and confronting them. Even if you are skeptical and afraid of the outcome,. But then you still want to know your fate.
You finally got up the courage and visited them unannounced, lol, and lo and behold, you met them healthy and hearty, probably going about their daily routine or another. It dawned on you that their actions were truly intentional.
There are no longer any justifications or benefits for doubt. You couldn’t hold back your tears; you sobbed and cried for days.
There are many questions and doubts, such as: am I not good enough? Why does he or she have to ignore me this way? Where did I go wrong? keeps popping up in your mind as you continue to blame yourself for their actions.
The quest for closure became so intense because you were so curious to know why they had to treat you in such a cruel way without any explanation. But the question is: will you ever have this closure? Since you noticed that their attitude is an intentional act,?
It is really necessary to know some of the reasons why you are being ghosted by your partner. Having this information will help you know if it is worth pursuing or not.
Why do people ghost their partners in a relationship?
1. Lack of interest.
This is one of the most common reasons why people ghost others in a relationship. ghosting seems to be the most cowardly yet easiest way to walk away from a relationship when the attraction is gone, because it means you don’t have to confront your partner compared to the conventional way of inviting him or her to a dinner and telling them the news.
This method usually works for people who want to get out of a peaceful relationship where there are no misunderstandings or problems.
If that’s the case here, there may be nothing left for you to do but move on. Looking for closure would also be a waste of time.
2. Life challenges and trauma
bspooky by your partner can sometimes be caused by life problems and trauma.
Some life situations can distract people from focusing on what they once cherished and held in high esteem. It can make them numb and make them react negatively to other things around them. In such cases, they may ghost their partner, as this may be their own way of dealing with their trauma.
The difference between this type of ghosting and the aforementioned lack of interest is that you will notice total silence and numbness in other areas of their lives. In other words, they can ghost not only you but other loved ones as well. You will also notice an increase in activity on all their social media profiles.
3.one-sided relationship.
Ghosting by your partner can result from one-sided relationship. When the feelings are not mutual, the relationship has to exist because of the desperation of the other party. There is a good chance that the partner who is not interested in the relationship will quickly ghost the other.
5. To minimize the pain and avoid causing a scene.
Many people believe that ghosting is the easiest way to break up with someone without hurting them or making them feel the pain. So they would rather disappear into thin air than watch you cry bitterly, hoping that you will eventually move on if you don’t hear from them for a few days, weeks or months.
What should you do if you’ve been ghosted? How can you deal with such a traumatic experience without falling into chronic depression?
Subtle ways to deal with ghosting by your partner.
1. Accept your fate.
The most challenging aspect of ghosting is accepting the fact that they are gone and not coming back to you.
At first, you just want to wake up and realize it was a nightmare. It is very difficult to admit reality because everything seems to happen so quickly and unexpectedly.
However, the sooner you admit your fate as a ghost, the easier it will be to let go of what is not meant to be.
2. Express your pain
And so you’re ghosted, so what? Bottle it up, act like you’re okay and move on as if nothing happened.
While these may seem like the best tips, understand that there are subtle ways to deal with rejection. After rejection!!! What now? The healing process. It usually starts with expressing your pain, feelings and frustration; don’t bottle it up or show it publicly. Sob in your closet; if you need to, write about it if there is a diary that needs to be documented. This is the first step of your healing phase. The more you express your pain, the freer your mind becomes to experience new events.
3. Analyze your strengths.
Being ghosted by your partner can create space for self-doubt, low self-esteem, and a lack of self-confidence, as ghosting is a form of rejection.
Your instincts will make you feel worthless because they couldn’t respect you enough, at least to physically confront you with the breakup news.
There will be temptations to keep blaming yourself for being the reason behind the breakup. But then you have to analyze your strengths and understand that you are not to blame.
Think of other achievements you have made; think of your friends and family who hold you in high esteem. Think about your contributions to the relationship. This will increase your self-esteem and confidence.
4. Distract yourself.
It’s not always easy to move on after a breakup, let alone one that you weren’t prepared for and never saw coming.
You will certainly struggle with many factors, such as the good memories when things were going well and their words of affirmation when they still considered you part of their lives. All this and much more will keep memories in your mind.
However, it takes a disciplined mind and a little distraction to gradually erase those memories. This distraction should revolve around doing what you love most: your passion, trying a new skill, hanging out with friends, making new friends, and enjoying the company of your family members. Never assume isolation, because that usually gives room for depression. Something like the habit of stalking them, especially for those who ghost you on purpose. Trying to know what they are up to or who they are seeing lately will always leave you devastated. I know it may be hard, but you have to resist the urge to stalk him or her. When the urge surfaces, look for distractions, as mentioned above.
5. Move on.
Sometimes, when you’re ghosted by your partner, all you can do is move on. Remember, the fault is not yours.
You can’t erase the situation, especially if they ghost you, because they are no longer interested in you.
The last resort is to move on. Except in rare cases where they have tangible reasons for ghosting you, such as challenges, you can rest assured that you’re not the only one receiving such treatment. In scenarios like this, there is a lot of optimism that they will definitely occur, but you still don’t have to hope that much.
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#ways #move #ghosted #partner